I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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