I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
