i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize