I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
