Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize