So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Randomize
