too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
