I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
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