You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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