Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
