I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
