Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
