I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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