dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
