idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
