There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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