ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
