it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
