just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
