i don't plan on having that self control this summer
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
