Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Randomize
