And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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