She is in my trunk
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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