i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
