yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize