I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
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