Joe is yelling at the trees again.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Randomize
