Quick, to the slutcave!
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
