SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
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