shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
