i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
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