Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
