I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Randomize
