Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
