Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
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