i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
My vagina just clenched in fear
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
