So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Ladies don't puke and tell
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize