I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
