just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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