My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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