If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
