She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
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