I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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