So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
No subtext here. People are naked.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
