Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Randomize
