it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
