False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
