glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
