So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
My vagina is officially offended.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Randomize
