nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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